The Town Called Pysht

There once was a ghost town called Pysht;

Perched near a small river with fysht;

Not much there to see,

It's quite anomaly

but

If its tree falls on you, you're squysht

OK, I'm not right in the head--we won't quibble about that.

I was researching old ghost towns for a new novel I'm working on and came across this uniquely-named gem. How can you notice a town called Pysht and not be charmed? 

Not that it's not already well-known that Washington has more than its fair share of oddly-named-and pronounced cities. Puyallup, Sequim, Spokane, you all know those. But I had never heard of Pysht before. 

Spread all across the country are small towns like this: former mining towns, towns that just missed the highway bypass, towns built around a business or entertainment venue that died. Every time I see one or read about one of these towns, I get a spooky, other-world feeling. Especially when I see rickety remnants of buildings, homes, tools, toys and other possessions lying around. I feel hushed, like I want to soak in all of the history, and listen for the stories of the spirits that linger there. 

But instead I'm inspired to pen an atrocious limerick.

The Good God Sugar Scare

Bad, bad Auntie. Go ahead and say it.

But, hey, I've been busy writing, editing and polishing up my self-published novel.

And now it's on the market, Spirit of the Mercury Dime, and it is said that ya gotta blog in order to expect any sales other than to good old ma and pa. (You always can rely on those two, dear souls).

And I certainly have enough to rant about, so why not share it with the world? Right-o, that's what I say!

Today's rant concerns one of the deadliest substance to strike mankind--I'm talking about SUGAR, of course.  Did you read about this? Studies show (ah, look it up I don't know who the "study-ers" are, but it was right there on the news) that a normal weight person should consume no more than 25 grams of sugar daily. Now, perhaps if you're talking weed or some other such substance, 25 grams might be nirvana, but we're talking 25 grams of sugar, table sugar, sucrose, that white stuff in the bunny canister on your kitchen counter.

FOUR HERSHEY KISSES! Honest to pete, that's about what 25 grams of sugar entails.

And now "they're" telling us that this sugar habit is undermining the very fabric of our lives. Ruining families, destroying children, causing chaos in the streets. Turning us all into lazy fatties.

Well, I'd like to say a few words about "they." We all know who "they" are. They're the same folks who turn a blind eye to those digging filthy gas wells that cause earthquakes and putrid water, the ones who are cutting off our jobs, those who eliminated manufacturing from our country, stole our pensions (and have a greedy eye and drooling mouth on our social security), those who ruined our housing investments, and bought all of our politicians.  "They" love those folks, those folks can do no wrong. Never a peep against those folks.

But SUGAR?!!  Sugar is a deadly menace and must be destroyed.

Sorry, not buying it. Well, yes, it's Halloween and I am indeed buying it. Sugar, that is.

Remember eggs?? My neck still has whiplash from seeing eggs bounce back and forth from the "Yes" to the "Good God No" column. I think it's now Yes......3...2....1...

Enjoy your sugar, folks. In moderation, perhaps, but that 25 grams stuff is nonsense. Sugar has energy and heaven knows we all need more of that.

By the way, did you realize that 20% of your caloric needs is used by your brain? Sit on that, Fitbit.

Cheers.